Positive Affirmations, blah, blah, blah

     For years, self help gurus have touted positive affirmations as a way to improve your self esteem.  Have you tried it?  How'd it work out for you?  Did you stand in front of the mirror looking at your size 16 body and tell yourself that you're a size 8, lean and fit!?  


     .......Right!


     Self esteem is a measure of how much you believe in yourself.  If you are actively looking into the mirror and lying to yourself, well, how can you believe in someone who lies?

     If you practice continuous improvement (and I think you should!), then you have the ability to turn this around slowly but surely.  If the truth is-I'm a size 14, or I'm so unhappy I could cry, or I'm so angry, I could scream-then doesn't it serve your relationship with yourself best to be honest about how you feel?

     In the quest for personal improvement, you can shift to a statement that is still true, but less emotionally charged.  So instead of I'm a size 14, you say, "Right now, I'm a size 14 and I'm making healthy choices (if you are!) to change that."

     Instead of I'm so unhappy I could cry, try "I'm very unhappy at this moment and I'll try to smile instead of cry."

     Instead of I'm so angry I could scream, try "I'm very upset right now and another feeling will be along soon."

     Each of these corrections subtly changes the energy of the statement.  It doesn't make it any less true, just less harsh.  

     Play around with this.  Employ that deep, inner knowing we all have.  If you go too far with your correction, your gut will tell you so.  It won't feel right.  When you have it just right, you will know. 

     Let me explain further:  Instead of saying I'm so unhappy I could cry, you might start with the opposite-I'm so happy I could dance and sing.  Right away, you know this isn't right.  Bring it down a bit:  I'm so happy I could just smile.  Yes?  No?  Try, I'm unhappy and I'll laugh anyway.  Closer?  Try this:  I'm unhappy and I'll smile instead of cry.  This might finally feel "right" or "true".  Less emotional charge, so small improvement.  

     Practice truth telling with yourself.  The more honest you can be, the better trust and confidence you'll have in YOU!  That works better than any positive affirmation in the world!

     If you have questions, I want to help.  Email me, post in the forum, or check out my packages.  I'll send you my five favorite relationship tips if you go here.  

     In knowing,

     Allison