Six Questions for a Relationship Check In

           Relationships take a lot of time, attention and effort to be winning ones. Sometimes, you may avoid “checking in” because you want to avoid any negative feelings lurking there. You don’t want to mess up a good thing.

     Checking in on a regular basis can help you catch issues when they’re small. Ignoring or overlooking things that bother you, leads to bigger resentments which can’t be overcome if they go too far. 

These six easy questions will give you a quick gauge of your relationship:

1. Do I know my relationship goal? If it’s a happy, healthy lifetime together, you have to learn to work things out.  
2. Are there any potential risks to my relationship? Are either of us confiding in someone outside the relationship? Risks could include a demanding job, too much emphasis on the children, or addictions. Pay attention to these concerns.  
3. Am I taking advice from people who have what I want? Don’t talk about your relationship with someone who’s bitter about relationships. Talk to those who’ve managed some success or those who’ve learned from their mistakes. 
4. Am I showing up in the way I need to? What is my relationship goal (see question 1)? If you want to be close to your partner, are you sharing yourself with them? If you want a supportive relationship, are you supporting your partner? We can all behave in ways that look like what we want, even if we’re not there yet. 
5. What do I value and appreciate about my partner? Gratitude is the anecdote to so many things. Make a practice of looking for things to appreciate about your partner. All the time. 
6. What’s one thing I could do today to show my partner I care about them? With no expectations of acknowledgment or reciprocation!

     Relationships involve give and take, ups and downs. Mastering the flow is something you’ll be studying for the rest of the relationship. Small problems are easier than big ones, so don’t ignore them. You won’t always feel great about all these questions. Checking in consistently and persistently sets the stage for a winning relationship.

How's it going?
Allison 

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